Sunday, August 2, 2009

Please do not ask me to settle.

I want a shower with a sky-light.
I want to wash my hair in sunshine, condition the ends with clouds. On the overcast days I will keep my eyes shut tightly. On the rainy days I will open my eyes and pretend I'm showering in the rain forest. I will imagine my soap dish is a tree frog, watching me wash away a days worth of blood sweat and tears.

I want a big kitchen sink to do my dishes in.
No I do not want a "dish washer." We had one in my old house as a kid, it broke, we used it as a place to dry dishes after I'd hand washed them. I want green apple dish soap and three different wash cloths, clean at all times. I want an assortment of hand towels. I want to wake up in the mornings and look at all my dry dishes, I'll gently put them away, quietly because everybody else is sleeping.

I want hard wood floors.
I do not want a filthy carpet that the neighbors (when they come over to borrow a cup of Splenda,) will drag in all the dirt on their boots. Carpets are filthy dirty devices.
I want the sun to bounce off the wood and for my footprints to stick in humidity.

I want a big porch with a porch swing.
I want to sit and swing and sit and swing for hours, or until I feel sick. I want to enjoy my morning cup of coffee on that swing. I want to rock my first born child to sleep humming something soft and sweet. I'll sit there at night, still as a bird, and catch my first born sneaking in past his/her curfew.
I'll shout "GOTCHA!" and scare the crap out of them!
I'll shake my knobby finger in their face and say "You can't fool mama!"

I want a husband who tells me he loves me every single day.
Regardless if my bum gets too wide and my lips lose their fullness
I'll have wrinkles and frizzy hair
My teeth won't be as white
I'll have stretch marks and a doughy stomach, years of abuse from harvesting little humans inside my uterus.
But my man won't mind! He will push his wrinkled nose into mine and whisper "I love you."

I want to bake my family pies, and biscuits. I want to set the table for dinner every night, even if it's just my husband and I because the kids are busy with their extracurricular activities. I want to adorn my children's Easter baskets with tacky fake grass, I'll rot their teeth out with too much candy. I want to buy my children dental floss. I want to memorize my future husbands brand of deodorant, I want to buy that for him. I want to be a nurturing mama bear, I want to buy my children's school portraits because that's what normal parents do. I'll frame their pictures and embarrassingly show their future prom dates. I want my children to never question my morals. I want to be the best possible mother. I want those hard wood floors, I guess you could say I want the white picket fence? Ok, fine, throw that in there!


electriccbloomm said...

You have no idea how similar this is to my idea of "adult life." Seriously, that warmed my heart. It's nice knowing that there is someone out there who wouldn't laugh at me when I tell them how badly I want to be a wife and mother with the white picket fence.

Alyssa said...

This made me smile